Just a few short weeks ago, Running and I were going through a rough patch. We almost got counseling. Fret not, all is well now. Our relationship has been made anew by my last race.
Standing at the starting line, anticipating the gun, my mind started to wander. I thought about all of the preparation that had brought me to this place, to this feeling. Months of following The Training Plan- running when tired, hot, cold, sore, hungry, and worst of all, apathetic. Hours spent prepping for runs- rationing nutrition, studying trail maps, ensuring gear was ready, arranging babysitting, Body Gliding EVERYTHING. Weeks spent sick because my body wasn't recovering as quickly as I needed it to. Here I was. Moments away from the test of my preparation. A calm overtook me. I mentally apologized to Running for being such a sissy the past three weeks and for putting up such a fight. Running had never let me down before; why did I think, that after 16 years of loyal courtship, Running would abandon me? Silly, Lara.
While I have fun with triathlons and, more specifically, cycling, nothing compares to the relationship I have with Running. It is the truest measure of ones self. It is the purest form of being. It will not be encumbered or adulterated. To run, all I have to do is step outside and go. Technically, I don't even need shoes (and sometimes I don't even have those!). As much as I enjoy cycling, I'll never have a few grand to drop on a full carbon bike, or a super fancy wheel set. So, I'm essentially limited in my performance by what I can afford to spend. Sure, there is equipment that accompanies me on my runs, but I can't buy a nicer water bottle to make me faster. Running is me, and nothing else.
Running is where I find myself when I'm lost, where I soak up the beauty of God's creation, where I connect with my running partners, where everything makes sense. Running has always kept me safe. When my life was in a place that it clearly didn't need to be, Running kept me from falling apart. The strength that I found through Running was the same strength I used to make the change that I so desperately needed. Through Running, I have found love. For my surroundings: fiery Myakka sunrises, quiet Siesta sunsets, a full moon lighting the sidewalk when the street lights are asleep. For my body: pushing it to the limits, asking more than I should, and it responding when it mattered most. For my mind: coming through when body wasn't compelled to cooperate. For my friends and family: their acceptance of my quirks and unwavering support of my goals. For my daughter: less than two years old, she woke up early, stayed up late, sat in a running stroller for as far as 18 miles. This little creature was always eager for the run. Yelling "Ready, set, GOOOOO!!!" when stoping at a red light waiting to cross the street. For my Michael. I can unequivocally say that I have found my mate in this life. He doesn't complete me, he amplifies me. I wouldn't be so in love with Running if I weren't so in love with him. Because what fun is it to love something so much if you can't share it with the someone you love?
I can't help myself but to include a line from a song by Rise Against.
"If love is a labor, I'll slave till the end"
This love is most definitely a labor, but therein lies the beauty. For why have something that isn't worthy of effort?
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